Hello Everyone, thank you for coming. My name is Cody Bennett. I’m a former Little.
I was asked to share my story with you today to let you know of the impact that a match can have on a life.
I was a pretty normal kid… I got in lots of fights at school, did all my homework, got good grades, and still had time to play outside. The biggest “difference” –if you will- was that I grew up without a father. That’s initially why my Mother enrolled me as a little – to have a male role model. That was in first grade. It’s amazing how time flies – I’m 23 now.
Thinking back, I actually have 4 distinct memories of my dad, all short – a couple meetings in person, a phone call and then his burial. He died of alcohol poisoning when I was eight. I remember being back at school thinking, “Geeze… all these kids complain about going back and forth between divorced parents… they just don’t get it.” I realized that something had been stolen from me that they still had – Hope.
The following spring, I was matched to a great guy, though I don’t know that I was what he had bargained for. I can only imagine that I was quite the handful. With my Father’s death, things had spiraled for me. I recall going to several different therapists – in school and out –, fighting with my younger brother regularly, and generally pulling away from people. I was energetic and personable, but at the same time, withdrawn. It was nice to be off of the perpetual waiting list, though I never felt really close to him. Our match ended 2 years later – back to the waiting list.
My depression continued with time. Resentful. Bitter. Angry. My family relationships were suffering immensely. It even got so bad that I seriously considered suicide – that was in 7th grade.
In the winter, I met Bill and Sharon at a weekend retreat with Big Brothers/Big Sisters – we just ‘clicked’. There, I remember staying up late learning about static electricity from Sharon and her dog Nanook, and then getting up at 5 in the morning to go skiing with Bill before everyone else was awake. That weekend would forever change my life.
It turned out that shortly after that trip, Bill and Sharon’s previous match ended. Because of the time spent together, they requested me from the caseworker. Since then, the impact of those two has been immeasurable.
My mother wanted a male role model and Bill has filled that with amazing grace. Never judging me or my choices, he always expected that I do, and be, more. What astonishes me about Bill is that he is constantly growing and changing as a person, which has taught me a great lesson. They have always been supportive with the hard times in life, and I don’t thank them enough. I am so grateful that I had a unbiased friend to spend time with and learn from.
Sharon has fit the description of Big Sister perfectly. She has been there to give advice on relationships, and to help me develop my love for the finer things in life – including fresh blueberry pie. All these years, officially matched or not, she has been a forum for me to take my challenges. Her kind, thoughtful, and supportive demeanor has always provided a means to work through any issue.
Another thing that has been good for me is that they are an excellent example of how a true relationship can and should be. I have learned love and compassion from the both of them. I even had the honor of being the Best Man at their wedding.
It’s funny to look back at all the times we’ve shared and realize that it’s not the amount of time spent, nor the number of outings that we’ve had that made the biggest impact. One of the best memories during our official match was a time where we had made dinner, popped in a movie, sat down to watch, and promptly fell asleep. This match has helped me to realize the importance of a relationship, and the value of mentorship.
A lot of the time, there isn’t a mentor in a younger person’s life – parents are at times the enemy, and peers… They don’t know right from wrong. It’s imperative that people in the community reach out to help guide children – our school system simply doesn’t cut it in that respect.
On the books, our match ended 5 years ago, however, due to the friendship, guidance, and love, our bond will continue for all the years to come. We’ll continue working hand in hand to improve the world, one child at a time.
I now have hope again; hope that someday, both you and I, will have a meaningful impact in a child’s life – the same way that my Bigs have helped to shape me.
Thank you.